I Love Summer!

Summer is the time for grilling! The only thing I am good at grilling are potatoes in tinfoil and s'mores. However, I am married to a grilling God! The steaks Brian made tonight were phenomenal!! They were juicy, seasoned and cooked perfectly! In fact, I told him I would like to buy a cow so we would be able to have amazing steaks like that any night we wanted!! How crazy is that?!

Doesn't this look amazing?!

Along with the steaks I made a little sauteed mixture of onion, mushroom and green beans. I seasoned them with garlic, salt and pepper. The dish was really great, but I felt it was missing something. I think next time I will try adding some balsamic and some cheese. That sounds delish!

Two pictures of the side dish!

We also had strawberries to round things out. Adelle grabbed a bunch and took off the stems. She picked them off one leaf at a time, gave them to me and said, "ishy, Mommy!"

One of the perfect summer meals!

Happy Anniversary!

5 years ago today, I married my best friend and someone I was excited to spend the rest of my life with. Well, it has been 5 years and am more in love with him and am more excited to see what the rest of our lives will bring.

I already know Brian is a wonderful man, loving husband and doting father to our beautiful little girl. I can wait to experience life with a teenager, life in our middle ages, and then life as retirees.

Challenges, surprises. Happy times, sad times. Sickness, health.

All that matters is that we love each other, communicate and work through everything with the other by our side.

Happy Five Year Anniversary, Brian. I love you!!

Wow... It's been a while!!

I have been wanting to do so much at school that I have left my blog to get dusty. So, I will begin cleaning my thoughts out, then bring on the pictures. That, however, might have to wait until Sunday.

During my time away, I have done a lot of thinking. Serious thinking, and silly thinking. Here are some of the highs (and lows)!

I need a haircut, and am thinking of getting highlights. I don't know what to get but need to decide today or tomorrow because school pictures are Friday!! EEK!

I like makeup. I am not really a girly-girl so I am not really sure how to apply it.

It bugs me that I can't test nail polish before I buy it. I don't want to to spend $7 for a color I don't like.

I FINISHED MY FIRST 5K!! HOLY CRAP!! I honestly didn't think I'd be able to do it, but I did! Jessica, Maria and Brian helped as much as they could. I threw a lot of things at them and they stayed by my side. I plan on doing more running so I can improve my time (45 minutes 53 seconds) next year!

We found a fun place to eat... Pizza Ranch! I've always wanted to be able to have A slice from a couple of different pizzas. Here, you can!! They even have dessert pizzas that are scrumptious!

I hate my eczema/psoriasis/allergy!! It is making me ANGRY!! I hate how my hands and feet are always in pain. I hate worrying if I am going to bleed on things. I want to be able to wear all kinds of clothes. To top it all off, I feel like I am getting arthritis in my hands. There are some days my hands are so stiff, usually in the morning. However, I STILL wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.

I like cake. I really like cake.

I am thankful for my job! I love what I do and enjoy every minute. Even when it's challenging and draining. I love what I do and am thankful for it everyday!!

I want to be the best Mommy ever! I want to give Adelle everything I can and then some. I want her to feel happy, safe and loved of every minute of every day. I think I'm doing a good job, but I think I am so self-conscious that I don't let myself believe it sometimes.

I want to be the best Wife ever! Brian is an incredible person and I work every day to care for him the way he cares for me. He is truly my best friend. He and Adelle are the best part of my day!

I want to have another baby. I want Adelle to have a little brother or sister to play with. Thoughts of having another little one to hold and care for are consuming. I think about it when I'm at work, when I'm home, when I'm driving and when I sleep. But I'm scared. I am scared about if I can get pregnant again. I am scared about how long it will take to get pregnant again. I am scared about when we'd actually have the baby (a due date) and if it would be during school or during the summer. I'm scared about what that would mean for us financially. Daycare. Teaching. Everything. I know that people say it's really never a perfect time (financially) to have a baby, but my fear feels almost crippling at times.

What have YOU been thinking about?!

Happy New Year!

Today marks the night when, one year ago, we were rubbing my unbelievably big pregnant belly and reading Harry Potter to our unborn baby girl. We were rubbing my belly, asking her to be healthy and to stay in there until she was ready. We rang in 2010 with a kiss and drifted off to sleep.

Today is one of those days where I look back at the incredible year I've had. I look back and realize that we've come such a long way and can't help but be proud of us. We welcomed a baby girl into the world. We've watched her grow and discover how to roll over, to sit, stand, and even walk along furniture. We've begun parenting and are learning as we go, but I am proud of us still.

I'd like to work on a few things this year though. Here is a little list of what I want to accomplish, kind of like a little Bucket List. I don't think I need to do everything this year, it's more of an ongoing list, but a list nonetheless. I got the idea from a fun blog I read, The Honey B Blog.

Getting to a Comfortable Weight
I've been dealing with my weight since I was little. I mean, I can look back to my 4th grade class picture and remember what people said when they saw the picture. I don't want to be a skinny minny, and in no way do I want to be a size 0, but I do need to lose weight. I really just want to be able to shop at Target in the regular sizes. I am JUST into the plus sizes, so hopefully this is a goal I can accomplish relatively quickly.

Become More Active
One way I can accomplish the weight goal is to become more active. I really like walking and going for bike rides, and I really love to go swimming! The thing is, I need to find a trailer for Adelle (for my bike), get really great shoes I only use for exercise, and I need to find a place I can swim. I really like to join LifeTime or the Y because they offer child care while we work out, but it's so expensive. I've also signed up for a Wii Fitness Group online who will support each other and offer assistance.

De-Clutter
Brian and I live in a townhouse. We don't have a lot of space as it is, and with a child, the space has been shrinking quite a bit due to all of the toys and outgrown clothes. I still have papers from when I was in high school and the first few years of college. Why do I still have these?! Then I have a whole lot of stamping/scrapbooking things I can get rid of because I haven't used them. We also have some small appliances we aren't using... having a garage sale sounds great, but maybe Craig's List or eBay would be better. Any suggestions/ideas?

Save More Money
We are working on our savings account and want to make sure we have enough in there in case something happens. I think it's self explanatory.

Cut Down Debt
This will work in conjunction with saving more money. We don't have a ton, but we don't want to let it run our lives. We want to make sure we stay on top of it, ya know?!

Finish My Masters
I started my masters the year I met Brian. I have yet to finish it due to finances, but I want to finish. It was fun learning all of those new things and to be finished would be so fantastic!!

Take a Trip to Maine
Brian and I wanted to take a cue from my parents and go on a second honeymoon to Maine. Mom and Dad RAVED about the lobster and the scenery when they went. Well, Brian really loves both of those things, as do I. We wouldn't go for a long time, but long enough to get our fill of lobster, hiking, nature pictures, and the LL Bean Outlet!

Scrap/Sew More
I love scrapping! I love making cards and working on albums. I have loved working on my sewing projects too! I want to set aside one day a week to work on those things. I am not sure if that will work with a one year old, but I can hope.

Baby #2
'Nuff said! We aren't pregnant but are thinking about trying again sometime next year. Who knows?!

I hope you have a wonderful new year! I hope it's filled with happiness, laughter, health and love! Stay safe this year and be well!!

New Car and Santa

No, Brian and I don't have a new car... but we've been thinking about what we should get once the time rolls around. Especially after the crazy amount of snow that fell last weekend! We've been talking about getting a small SUV or a crossover type vehicle specifically to be up off the ground more and to have 4-wheel drive.

Which brings us to Wednesday. Brian and I took Adelle to Burnsville Center to sit on Santa's lap. We got there around 5:15p, even though Santa wasn't scheduled to be back from his break until 6pm, and proceeded to join the line - we were 2nd! YAY!! We stood in line for a while, I walked around with Adelle for a while, I let Adelle crawl around on the floor a while, then we went back in line.

What does this have to do with a new car you ask?! Well, one of the Toyota dealerships had a Sienna on display in the Santa line. The sliding doors were open so you could see all of the bells and whistles - and there were literally bells inside on some wreaths! Then on one side, the side we happened to be sitting on, they had a smallish flat screen tv hooked up playing, no, LOOPING a video.

At first, I really liked the video and the song. It was funny, cute, and even pretty catchy. Then, after about the 15th time I heard it, I wanted to turn it off and even wanted to write the dealership to suggest looping a few videos/commercials so people wouldn't want to hurl the tv across the food court. Then yesterday I said to Brian, "Hey honey? Do you know what song I want to hear?" He said no, then listed off some of my favorite songs. I said, "No. None of those. I want to listen to Swagger Wagon."

We smiled. I found this online this morning and it has made my day. I wonder if I can get it on iTunes?!

Pumpkin Patch: Day 1

So Brian and I wanted to get pumpkins this year. We wanted to take Adelle and get some pictures of her in the patch too, but it was CRAZY busy and the patch smelled like rotting pumpkins. In order to get to pumpkins not turning into compost, we had to walk through two patches! Needless to say, it was exhausting, chilly, and the pumpkins we found were perfect!

Here are the pictures from our trip. The last one is a close up of Adelle in the stroller!

Last Day of Summer

Today is the last official day of my summer vacation.

This is very sad for me and I am taking it kind of hard! I love being home with Adelle and I love being able to watch her grow and discover. She has changed so much in her 8 months, and I am very fortunate to have had these few months, but it still makes me sad.

Don't get me wrong, I am passionate about teaching and I love what I do. I am excited to get back to it, and meet my new students too!

Adelle will also be starting a new daycare on Monday. We are happy about this because she will be 3 or 4 blocks away from me, but there is always a nervousness about starting something new. Maybe that is just with me?! We need to make sure we have things ready for her to go: immunization records, diapers, wipes, formula, extra clothes. I hope I don't forget anything!!

Today though is for us. We will make the most of it and have a blast! We are visiting Daddy for lunch, a tradition we started when we first got together, and Auntie Angie and Cousin Lila will be visiting this afternoon. It will be a happy day indeed!

First Sleepover

Adelle had her first sleepover tonight with Bruce and Sharon. It was really hard to drive home without her, but it was good to have her with people we trust.

Our daycare provider has the week off, so we asked our families if anyone would want to watch Adelle while I was at school. While all of them jumped at the chance, Bruce and Sharon took her on Monday and Tuesday, and my Mom took her the rest of the week. It wasn't until , oh I don't know, Friday night that we realized we didn't have to work due to the holiday, but Bruce and Sharon took her anyway on Monday so Brian and I could have a day of errands.

It was fantastic!

First we had lunch, then we went to a movie (in an actual theater), then we ran a few errands (Target and Walgreens). When we got to the house, Adelle was just eating and we out her down for a nap. We figured it would be fine because we had ordered pizza so by the time we were finished eating, Adelle would be up and we would head home. Well, it didn't work out that way. The pizza was super late and it was past Addie's bed time so we thought, "why take her home when she is going to be here in the morning?!" So we made sure they had enough supplies, put Addie to bed, then left before I could break down. It was SO hard leaving her!!

I think it was better to do it like that, because I didn't have the chance to think about it. It was a quick decision and it turned out just fine. I hugged her extra hard when I picked her up though!!! ;)

Father's Day Part 2

Yesterday was Brian's first Father's Day. He was very sweet and got up early with Adelle and let me sleep in - this was NOT my intention! Once everyone was up, we played for a bit, ate, played on the Wii with Auntie Maria, then went to Nonna and Papi's house for dinner.


Adelle has been fussier than usual lately, and we aren't sure why. We sometimes think she's teething, but I have thought she has been doing that for ages now, so I don't know what is going on. I do know that she has her fingers in her mouth all of the time, she drools like mad, and has been fussy for the past few days. There is no sign of teeth anywhere! UGH!


Anyway, while we were there Adelle had her first experience with diet Coke! I think she likes it! She was also able to sit with Papi on his chair. She has been sitting for longer periods of time now!! YAY! We got home about 7:30 and Addie got to sleep around 8:15. A little later than normal, but not too bad!


I hope it was a good Father's Day because that is what Brian deserves!

Paternity Leave

So I think that fathers get the crappy end of the stick, especially when it comes to maternity leave. I know that the main reason for maternity leave is that it gives the mom time to heal after going through labor, but shouldn't fathers get time off too? Not necessarily to heal, but to bond?


I mean, I have 6 weeks of maternity leave. That is it! 6 weeks to get my little girl into routines strong enough for someone else to take care of her. 6 weeks to get to know my little girl. 6 weeks to heal. I understand that, medically, I should be fine by the time 6 weeks rolls around but Adelle will still be really young! I would love to be able to stay at home with her, but I can't and that ultimately kills me, but shouldn't I be able to take more time off if wanted? Shouldn't I be able to take time off if I have the available days? UGH! I don't have to go back to work for a few more weeks, so I will enjoy every moment I have until that time!


BRIAN, however, had to go back to work today! He was only able to take off a week. Well, that isn't exactly true. He COULD have taken off 3 weeks, but we thought it would be better for him to keep that time available if Adelle gets sick or can't go to day care. Those are valid reasons, but really, only a week? One week to get to know your little one? One week to bond? That is ridiculous!


We miss you Brian! It's really strange being here alone, and crazy to think that it's because I am taking care of our daughter! I do like anticipating you walking through the door though! I am also picturing what that will be like in the years to come - so sweet!

I love you and come home soon!!


This last picture was taken AFTER Daddy got home from work. She went right into his arms - adorable!

40 Weeks - Our Birth Story

I have said this a lot on the blog, but, you read that right! Adelle June is here and she arrived right on her due date! Brian kept teasing me that if ANYONE were to have a child on their due date it would be me. I am not sure I agree with that but I am glad he gets a kick out of it! This is also why I have been MIA for a while.

Our Birth Story
On Friday, January 1st, I got up, ate, and checked my email as usual. I was waiting for Brian to get up as I sent out my last email - to my sister-in-law telling her I wasn't feeling anything. As soon as I hit the send button I got a pain in my back. Not a big deal because I'd had those before. I dinked around a little more and decided to brush my teeth. As I was getting to the bathroom my back started hurting again. I went to lay down with Brian instead and told him about it. We talked for a little bit and I got another pain. We both checked the clock and realized the pains were 10 minutes apart and that this is the same spot I get my cramps in during my period. OMG - I am having BACK LABOR?! Yikes!!


So we kept track of them for the next couple of hours and from 9:30a - 10:30a they were consistently 10 minutes apart. From 10:30a - 11:30a they were consistently 6 minutes apart!! I hadn't had contractions like this ever so I was surprised they were that consistent that early. I tried to get ready for the day as much as possible, telling Brian about the contractions the entire time. We called the doctor and he told us to come in and get checked.


After getting ready - and eating a bit - we got to Labor & Delivery around 12:30p (on Friday the 1st). They checked my cervix and I was still only 1.5cm dilated, high, and almost completely effaced! They kept me there to monitor me. They monitored me for a while and my contractions weren't too strong so I walked around with Brian and Maria, my little sister, for an hour or so and they checked me again. 2cm. Really? That's it? So after monitoring me again for a bit they told me to walk again. I did for another hour or so and they checked me again. Still 2cm. They called the doctor and then sent me home! I wasn't making progress. UGH!


As soon as we were going out of the driveway at the hospital I wanted to kick someone in the throat my contraction was so bad! How could they send me home in pain like this?! We got home, I took the sleeping aid my doctor gave me and for the next few hours Brian and I were giants in a Swiss chalet aka our bedroom. The sleeping pill my doc gave me made me hallucinate - great! The contractions remained 6 minutes apart and were considerably worse than before. Apparently, I went from snoring to writhing in pain then back to snoring all while Brian timed everything and stayed alert! Aww!


Around 9 or 9:30p on Friday the 1st we called the doctor again, described what was happening and that I couldn't stand the pain any more - my back felt like it was going to rip in two! He told us to come back in. We got there and they checked me right away - 4cm! They put the monitors back on and asked what I wanted for the pain. A little while later I got my epidural, along with something else, and was out of it for the rest of the time! No joke. I was sleeping through some REALLY bad contractions! I was also shaking pretty violently. I had to really concentrate on NOT shaking and needed the room pretty quiet in order to do so.


Around 12a or 1a on the 2nd they checked me again and I was about 7cm. We - Brian and Maria - called/texted our families. Within an hour everyone was at the hospital! Around 3:30a I was checked again and was 10cm and the nurse said, "Oh my. Your little Adelle is right there and has a beautiful head of hair!" WHAT! Oh my goodness! There was a part of me that was super excited and a part of me that was kind of scared for the next part.


I started to push around 4a. Since I was shaking so much, I was SUPER nauseous. So I had to stop a couple of times because I thought I was going to throw up. Thank goodness that was between contractions! After what felt like an eternity, my doctor came in around 5a. Adelle was having trouble getting past my tail bone so we decided to use a vacuum. They also informed me that while I had been pushing, she had pooped in the amniotic fluid. It wasn't there when my water broke so that was good, but she would still need to be checked out right away. This made me feel awful! I felt like it was my fault she pooped - because I couldn't push her out right away. Thank goodness that feeling went away with the next contraction.


At 5:21a Adelle came into the world!! Though they put her on my chest right away to clamp the cord, she was taken to the other side of the room and checked. Her APGARS were 8 and 9! Her lungs were clear! She weighed 7lbs 6oz. 21.5inches long and her head circumference was 13.5 even with a full head of brown hair! She was PERFECT!!




She was placed on my belly/chest while the doctor was finishing up whatever he needed to do with me - stitches and making sure everything was under control - and it was the most amazing feeling in the world! My little girl was here!


Euphoria!!


Brian was amazing! He was up almost a complete 24 hours making sure I was ok, timing contractions, keeping people informed, he was my everything - I couldn't have done it without him. Maria was great and made sure Brian was ok. Getting things for us/him, keeping him company since I was sleeping. I don't think he could have done it without her.


What a blessed way to start out the new year!!

Doctor Appointment

Well, we went to see Dr. H yesterday. Everything was great - my weight, blood pressure, measurements, everything! He guessed that Adelle weighs about 7.5 pounds, which is just fine with me, and that things look good. He did say that, since last Wednesday, I am 90% effaced but still only 1.5cm dilated. Though I am happy that I have made progress with how much I am effaced, I am a little disappointed that I am still 1.5cm dilated. I would have liked to see more progress for the simple truth, I like progress. It doesn't matter to me if she comes this week or next, as long as she's healthy, but I like to make progress. Ya know?

Dr. H then talked with us about inducing labor and when he would do that and what he would do. Everything he said sounded fine with us and put our minds at ease about that. We then asked a few more questions about our birth plan, medicine once I am in labor, as well as the H1N1 shot. He looked at us when we mentioned that and said, "You haven't gotten one yet?!" We said that no one had asked us about it since October, when they didn't have any, and then we kept forgetting to ask him about it! But Brian had a physical yesterday and got one so it was on our minds. I got mine last night and I forgot how my arm feels after a shot. It was heavy all night. Oh well.

So, now I am off to run errands. Maybe the walking will stimulate some progress! Who knows - I just know I need to get this stuff done.

Nervous and a trip to L&D

So Saturday was great. I got things done around the house, ran errands, and even started having some contractions. Granted, they weren't regular and most weren't painful so I didn't think I was in labor, but I was having them.

We were running around so much that when we got home I had to lay down. I put my feet up on Brian and even snoozed for a bit. A little while later I realized that I hadn't felt Adelle move for a little bit. I shrugged it off as, I just haven't NOTICED her moving but then started paying attention to any movements. Well, I didn't feel any - not even hiccups. I drank a glass of cold water, some pop, and even ate something and nothing happened. No movement. I was starting to get really freaked out so Brian called the nurse who called the on-call doctor, who happened to be OUR doctor. We talked and he said that he wanted us to go in to Labor and Delivery to get monitored. With this news I started crying, but told him it was ok. He said that it was just a precaution and most times it is to help ease the mothers' nerves/mind.

We got to the hospital around 8:55pm (after a 5-8 minute drive) and I was hooked up to the monitor by 9:03pm. Right away I noticed that Adelle's heartbeat was slower than it has been, then it would jump up, then drop low, and I got nervous again. The awesome nurse, Tracy, told us that is what they look for. That means she is just being active. I told her that I wasn't able to feel anything yet and she said that that was ok too, but she wanted me to tell her when I could. 7 minutes - 7 really LONG minutes later I felt a couple of kicks and at 9:15pm I felt another. Tracy came back in and said that things looked just fine for both of us and that she was going to call Dr. H and see what he wanted to do. I was able to go home a little after 9:30pm and told to follow up with Dr. H on Monday at our appointment.

Even though I wasn't there for very long it was surreal. That was my very first time in an actual hospital bed, aside from when Brian was in the hospital a few years back and I cuddled with him for a few minutes. It was only the second time I had ever been in a hospital gown, and the third time I had been hooked up to machines. What was surreal though, was walking to Labor and Delivery, checking in at the front desk, filling out a few papers (and by filling out I really mean checking to make sure things are correct), and getting my little bracelet. I kept wondering if that is what it would feel like when I HAD to go to the hospital.

One thing I realized was that as I was laying on my side, my hip started hurting. I think I was laying right in one of the creases/cracks of the bed. I'll have to remember to avoid that when I do go back to the hospital.

Another thing I realized - though NOT for the first time - was that Brian and I are so amazing together. I don't think I could do this - or that - without him. He was comforting, strong and level headed the entire time. In fact, he was putting in Transformers 2 to see if Adelle would move to that since she went crazy when we watched it before. How sweet was that?

He is going to make an incredible Daddy!

YAY!

He's on his way home! I can't wait to give him a huge hug - after he's taken a shower of course!! Ok, I don't really care if he showers first. I'll take stink and all!!!

I am so happy!

The Longest Week Ever

I knew that Brian enjoyed to hunt when I met him 5 years ago. I knew that he had a passion for being outside, watching nature, and the thrill of that chase. I even knew that he goes on week long trips once or twice a year with Bruce. These trips have been harder for me as the years passed though.

The first year (2005) was just fine because, although I missed him terribly, I was living on my own and kept busy the entire time he was gone. It was my second year teaching and it encompassed me. The next year (2006) was harder because we had just bought and moved into a house together. Being alone was tough because, for some reason, I didn't feel ready to be alone in the house. I didn't feel comfortable with it yet - it wasn't ours somehow. 2007 brought a different feeling altogether. We had gotten married a few short months prior to his leaving and when he left I had this nagging feeling that my husband had just left for a week. I mean, I was comfortable in our house but for some reason I missed him more because of the simple fact that he was my husband. Nothing else had changed - it was just that he had become my husband. I felt the same way last year when left. We had been trying to get pregnant and I missed him a lot (like the year before) but I was also a little relieved that we were able to take a break from all of the stress that trying to conceive brought to our lives.

However, this year brings new feelings that I am not sure how to harness. I am certain some of them have to do with the fact that I am 29 weeks pregnant, but I miss him desperately! My mom has said that "absence makes the heart grow fonder" but forget that! My heart is already fond - I love him, I married him, I am having a baby with him - my heart is already fond!! I just want to be able to hug him and have him talk with me and Adelle. She misses him too in fact. When he left he put his hands on my belly and talked with her. He told her that he would be gone for a few days and that he was coming back soon. He said to take care of me and not to kick me too hard. She immediately started kicking and moving at the sound of his voice!! That night, when I started reading she kicked me once as if to say, "You're not the one who should be reading. Where's Daddy?" Now, when I read at night she kicks a little bit, but when I talk about Daddy she kicks more!

Don't get me wrong, I want Brian to "get" an elk while he's out there, but I also want him to be here with us. So until I get that phone call or text, saying that he is on his way back to his uncle's house (the first stop before coming home), it will continue to be the longest week ever!